He ran towards me with wild eyes, screaming, “Mommy! Mommy!!! Help me!"
There was only about twenty yards between us, but it felt like two hundred. Finally, he collapsed in my arms.
“He was hitting me, Mommy! And he threw a stick at me! It hit me in the head!”
I already knew what had happened. I’d seen it all from the kitchen window. Still, I let him continue to talk as I rubbed his head and held him close, my heart breaking that a mere five year old child could feel so much distress over a situation he didn’t have much control over.
Then, with earnest eyes, he looks up at me. “Mommy, next time you hear me screaming like that, you have to come right away, alright? Don’t wait. Come as fast as you can. I was calling for you, and…”
I hugged him tightly again and whispered in his ear, “I did come right away! I heard you calling! It took me a minute get from the kitchen to the back door, honey, but I came as fast as I could.”
“But Mommy, I was calling you…and you weren’t there…”
Sometimes, in my naivety, I have conversations like that with God.
“God, I was calling You, and You weren’t there!”
“God, I needed Your help! Where were You?!”
“Why didn’t You come right away when I called?”
And then I collapse in His arms and He wraps His arms around me, speaking these words into my heart:
”Even to your old age and gray hairs I am He, I am He who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you.” Isaiah 46:4He is my Sustainer when I’ve done all I know to do.
He is my Rescuer when I am wild-eyed and frightened.
He is the One Who carries me when I’ve fallen at His feet.
And I am reminded that, despite His perceived silence at times ~ despite my absolute blindness at times ~ He is always there, always at work for my ultimate good.
In Passionate Pursuit,
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