What I Think I Deserve

I'm thinking of Mary today.

How, just a few days before Christ's birth, she must have been feeling stretched and sore, not only from being so heavy with child, but from her time of distant travels.

How I might have felt, in her place, after such a journey.

How, in my humanity and utter imperfectness, I would have felt when my husband could not find an inn with room for us.

No room?  In any inn?  Can they not see that I am in desperate need of a warm room, midwife assistance, a soothing hot drink?  My child is coming.  How could you not make room for me?  For my little one?  Sir, what about you, would you give us your room, if even for one night? 

My flesh cringes.  I'm ashamed.  Any ounce of righteousness I think I have is truly... filthy rags.  They cling to me, and I want to rip them off.

Oh, who am I to think I would deserve such things, such luxuries, such compassion? 

And yet sometimes we go about life that way.

I deserve that nice car, or that big house, or steak for dinner.  Or.... my children deserve more toys, an ivy league education, or the latest video game.  After all, everyone else has it, right?  Are they any better than I am?  Worse yet, who are THEY to have it, and why shouldn't I?

Yet Mary, about to give birth to the Saviour of the world, did not even have a proper room to give birth to him in.  Did that mean she was not special, not loved, not anointed for His purpose?  No!

We know this about Mary: "Hail, thou that art highly favored... blessed are thou among women" (Luke 1:28).  Highly favored!  Blessed among women!  No, her circumstances were not ideal, but she was right in line with the divine will of God.

What we have - or do not have - it not a measure of our worth.  And what others appear to have can be deceiving.  We are in grave danger when we begin to compare ourselves to others and think we deserve more than what we have, more than what He has provided, more than what we can comfortably afford.

Sometimes what we think we deserve is not the plan God has for us.  And, even when it's hard, even when we can't see why, His plan promises to be better than ours.  When we live life outside of His plan, believing we somehow deserve more, we lose our peace, sometimes we lose our families, some even lose their relationship with Him.

Born in a manger - a feed trough.  Yes, this was the King of kings and the Lord of all lords.

In our pride, our ambition, our ignorance, we continue to think we somehow deserve more, deserve better, that we have a right to "it," whatever "it" may be.

I lie prostrate, with my face to the floor.  Help me to be content with what You've provided.

He gives me the greatest of gifts: abundant life, salvation, grace, His Word, hope, real peace.

Teach my Thy ways, even when they look different than the world's ways, even when it may be hard or unpopular, even when I don't understand, even when it's uncomfortable.

Give me a Mary heart.

"Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me." Psalm 51:10


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Also shared at WFMW, Raising HomemakersDomestically DivineGratituesdayMade by You MondaysMake Your Home Sing Mondays and Marriage Mondays

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  1. I am often driven crazy by our culture that says "You desrve this" or "You deserve that". What each one of us truly deserve is death and hell. Anything above that is by God's grace alone. We often miss that. Excellent post!!!

  2. This was beautiful! How easy it is to get caught up in things and forget what really matters. I have never thought about this story from Mary's prespective.
    I'm a new follower from Marriage MOndays. Thank you!

  3. I stumbbled on to your site today and I LOVE your post. I have often thought of Mary, what this young girl thought and felt. Thank you for reminding me of the quiet grace she showed to the world.

  4. Excellent post Jaime . . . it gave me chills. We are a very spoiled society when we look at our life style in this day as opposed to the perspective you gave us. Beautiful perspective . . . one I will not forget soon.

    It was a beautiful message . . .

    Wishing you and your family a blessed Christmas . . . Gina

  5. Gina,

    Thank you for your sweet words, and a blessed Christmas to your family as well ~

    Jaime @ Like a Bubbling Brook

  6. What a beautiful post! We often fail to count all the blessing we have and complain the one we don't have!!! Who are we to complain about what the Lord gave us, saying that it isn't enough!

  7. Beautifully written and I love the picture too.

  8. I think Christmas has a unique power for us as women, because we can identify with Mary in so many ways. When I try to put myself in her sandals, it really does challenge me to examine my heart and my expectations.

  9. Beautiful post and so true. Contentment is a hard character quality to engraft, but oh so worth it.

  10. Thank you again for another wonderful post :)

    Merry Christmas-

  11. Jaime, you've been such a source of encouragement for me lately. Thank you so much for writing this!!

    I also appreciate you linking up with us.

    My warmest regards,



  12. I added myself to follow your blog. You are more than welcome to visit mine and become a follower if you want to.

    God Bless You :-)


  13. Hello Jaime.. It is nice to meet you. Your blog is inspiring and I loved your post today. Thank you for stopping by and I pray you have a very Merry and Blessed Christmas..

    God Bless...

  14. I am guilty as charged. I think I “deserve” too, when I have been given the most precious gifts already. I so need a Mary heart. Thanks for this post, Jaime. Merry Christmas.

  15. I love this post! A lot of truth, beautifully stated. I'm new to your blog--found you through "Walk With Him Wednesday" today!

  16. So glad you shared this Jaime. Neither Mary nor Jesus got much of what they really deserved, did they. But their humility and contentment and trust in God are in stunning contrast to my too-frequent feelings that I'm not getting what I think I should or I'm getting crud I think I shouldn't have to put up with. Thank you for your insight so beautifully shared!

  17. Our country has been blessed beyond measure... to the point where even the poorest of us have more than most of the others in the world. Satan has used this blessing to his advantage and perverted these blessings by diverting our eyes from the One who blesses us with these riches to ourselves... that *we* have done all of this; that it's not fair that someone else has more than we do because *we* deserve it, too - or perhaps even more than they do.

    Thank you for this amazing post to put things into perspective - it pulls the polite, acceptable fascade aside and exposes the truth in such a loving way. You have a beautiful heart, Jaime.

  18. Oh, Jaime,
    This was a well-thought, well-written post.
    I am amazed at your insight.
    Thank you.


I truly enjoy reading your comments. Thank you so much for taking the time to share your thoughts; you've all helped to create a wonderful little community here at Like a Bubbling Brook.

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I'm looking forward to reading what you have to say! I wish we could chat over coffee or tea one day ~



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